“Marley was dead: to begin with”. As Rizzo the Rat might say, spoiler alert! 

In December 1843, Charles Dickens published “A Christmas Carol” (unnecessary full title: “A Christmas Carol. In Prose. Being a Ghost Story of Christmas”) and it was a hit. Each edition published quickly sold out and prompted Dickens himself to undertake hugely popular public readings during Yuletide in the following years right up until his death in 1870. An inevitable staple of the leadup to Christmas, Dickens’ timeless story has become one of the most frequently adapted titles for stage and screen in the English language.

This is the story of Ebenezer Scrooge, a cruel, miserly and solitary businessman who despises charity, human warmth and empathy shown to others, especially during the festive season. To Scrooge, Christmas is “a humbug” and those who keep it and make merry, such as his impoverished clerk Bob Cratchit and kindly nephew Fred, are merely deluding themselves and others of the notion that we are kindly by nature. Following his usual 24th December dismissal of cheer and goodwill, Scrooge is visited the night before Christmas by three ghosts offering visions of his his past, present and future, and in so doing inspire lasting change in his outlook on life and his treatment of others.

If we considered every film, television special, miniseries and animation, we wouldn’t be done in time even for next Christmas, so we’ve limited our selection in this edition of Ranked to the most prominent film adaptations released theatrically. Based on creativity of the adaptation, critical reception and how each version evokes the spirit (pun intended) and message of Dickens’ work, this is The Film Magazine’s A Christmas Carol Films Ranked.

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9. Spirited (2022)

The second prominent contemporary reimagining of Charles Dickens’ supernatural fable appeared 34 years after Scrooged and is pretty shy on everything that appealed about Richard Donner’s film.

Advertising hotshot Clint Briggs (Ryan Reynolds) is the latest target for the Ghost of Christmas Present (Will Ferrell) to save from themselves, despite his soul being branded “irredeemable”.

If you’re going to quip about “all the other adaptations nobody asked for” in your film, you’ve really got to make sure yours delivers on its own terms. Spirited doesn’t.

New elements introduced in this version include the reason that the towering, hooded Christmas Yet to Come (voiced sporadically by Tracy Morgan) doesn’t talk is because he gets stage fright whenever it’s his line, and Christmas Past (Sunita Mani) has sex with the Scrooge stand-in because “it’s been a while” for her. Ha-ha.

“Now you’re going full Dickens on me?” Spirited ineffectually folds the Dickens story back in on itself and adds an unnecessary extra plot twist to it to stave off the boredom.

It’s also an original musical, for better and worse. You get one funny song (the so-bad-it’s-good bad cockney-accented Victorian musical number “Good Afternoon”) and one lovely one (a tender duet between Present and Octavia Spencer’s Kimberly, “The View from Here”), but generally the music sucks. At least the dance numbers are pretty energetic.

Spirited just doesn’t work on any compelling level, smothering the natural charisma of its two stars and Octavia Spencer, and dragging on its runtime to an annoying degree with witless humour and mostly lacklustre musicality.

8. Scrooge: A Christmas Carol (2022)

Netflix’s animated version of A Christmas Carol is actually a loose remake of the 1970 Albert Finney musical Scrooge, but this time starring an actor who can actually sing.

Jacob Marley’s wintry entrance scene and ominous warning to Scrooge is well done and easily the most imaginative sequence in the film, but all too often the visuals (particularly how the human characters are realised) seem more good-enough kids TV quality or overwhelmed by too many admittedly impressive environmental effects.

There are a couple of decent one-liners here, like Scrooge puzzling over the reality of his situation with “My dreams are never this… exciting” and commenting in surprise to the Ghost of Christmas Yet to Come “You don’t speak? Your colleagues are really rather fond of speaking”.

The ghosts all receive pretty creative re-designs, with Marley (Jonathan Pryce) looking like a creature from Elsa’s ice palace in Frozen, Christmas Past (Olivia Colman) portrayed carrying a candle made entirely of wax, and Christmas Present (Trevor Dion Nicholas) looking and acting like Santa if he appeared as a guest on ‘Drag Race’.

Everyone knows Luke Evans can belt out showtunes in his sleep, and he equips himself admirably here, especially in a nice duet with Jesse Buckley, even if you’d struggle to hum along to many of these songs by the time the credits roll (except the two best ones lifted from the Finney film, “I Like Life” and “Thank You Very Much”).

The voice talent filling out the ensemble is impressive and little ones will probably quite like it because it’s colourful, not too scary and there’s a bit where a dog farts on Scrooge’s face. Scrooge: A Christmas Carol is just about passable, but you will want to watch a more inspired version of this timeless story in short order.

Muppet Treasure Island (1996)
Director: Brian Henson
Screenplay: Jerry Juhl, Kirk R. Thatcher, James V. Hart
Starring: Tim Curry, Billy Connolly, Jennifer Saunders, Kevin Bishop, Dave Goelz, Steve Whitmire, Jerry Nelson, Kevin Clash, Bill Barretta, Frank Oz

For all those involved in the creation of what is The Muppets’ fifth theatrical release, surely only in their wildest dreams could they have envisaged that in 25 years time, their song “Cabin Fever” would be the unofficial anthem of the whole world. The fact that this song comes to mind to those down in the doldrums of prolonged indoor living, decades after its initial release, is a testament to the ongoing popularity of Muppet Treasure Island, and confirms that it can give all of its rivals a run for their money for title of Most Beloved Muppet Film.

After the huge success of The Muppet Christmas Carol with Disney, it made perfect sense for director Brian Henson to do another period piece. After a toss up with King Arthur, it was Robert Louis Stevenson’s novel “Treasure Island” that was gifted with the most outlandish film adaption in cinematic history. The story follows Jim Hawkins (Kevin Bishop), an orphan who works in the Benbow inn alongside his friends, Gonzo the Great and Rizzo the Rat, where they are often regaled by their regular, Captain Billy Bones (Billy Connolly) and his stories of the villainous Pirate, Captain Flint, and his buried treasure. These stories quickly turn into reality when Blind Pew, one of Billy’s old shipmates, arrives at the inn to give Billy Bones “The Black Spot”- a pirate’s death sentence. It turns out Billy Bones had Captain Flint’s treasure map in his possession the whole time, but whilst trying to escape from his old murderous shipmates he suddenly dies, passing down the map to Jim, who seizes the opportunity to follow in his late father’s footsteps and go on a sea adventure. He pitches the treasure quest to the dim-witted Squire Trelawney (Fozzie Bear) who agrees to finance the voyage, which he leaves the enigmatic Long John Silver (Tim Curry), a one-legged ship’s cook, to organise. However, Billy Bones’ dying warning (“Beware the one-legged man”) goes amiss, and no sooner than they have weighed anchor does it become obvious that the voyage has been sabotaged by pirates. Jim and Captain Smollett (Kermit the Frog), must then race against the pirates to find the treasure and escape Treasure Island alive.

Each Muppet theatrical release always had something new to bring to the table, either in terms of storytelling or technical innovation. The Muppet Movie (1979) was obviously a game-changer, accomplishing many puppetry feats such as Kermit riding a bike and Fozzie driving a car; The Great Muppet Caper (1981) had the muppets in high octane action sequences including Miss Piggy’s iconic motorbike chase; The Muppets Take Manhattan (1984) had Kermit and Miss Piggy finally tying the knot; and of course The Muppet Christmas Carol (1992) became one of the greatest film adaptions of all time, with its emotionally poignant yet silly retelling of the great Dickens tale. So what did Muppet Treasure Island have to bring to the table?

The movie doesn’t really cover any fresh ground, and although it had a much bigger budget than other Muppet films, it lacked some of the production value of its immediate predecessor (the recreation of Victorian London in the winter really was breath-taking). There is no major break through in the Muppet puppetry, and in terms of story it isn’t particularly original – not being the first Muppet period piece or the first “Treasure Island” film adaption – but Muppet Treasure Island does take all of the best elements of the previous Muppet film releases (and productions in general) and balances them perfectly in one of the most universally appealing family films of all time. For those who grew up on the works of Jim Henson, Muppet Treasure Island is the last of the truly great Muppet films, with all of its successors not quite managing to hit the ultimate sweet spot that fans have craved ever since.

The secret to Muppet Treasure Island‘s ability to enthral adults and children alike is its superb writing and direction. Both Brian Henson and Jerry Juhl are Muppet veterans, with Juhl providing writing since ‘The Muppet Show’ and Henson being enlisted in the family business since The Muppet Movie. And, judging by the huge box office and critical success of The Muppet Christmas Carol, both know how to do source material justice.

Robert Louis Stevenson’s original book is actually packed with murder and death, which if completely faithfully translated to film would prove to be a frightening watch for very young audiences, but the darker moments of Muppet Treasure Island are quickly balanced-out with comedy, breaking any tension. This isn’t just a benefit for any kids watching, Juhl’s comedy prowess is smart enough or at least absurd enough to leave most adults in hysterics. One such notable moment (of which there are many within the 99-minute runtime) is when Long John Silver fires his pistols to defend himself from his angry mob of pirates: one pirate is left grieving after one of his shipmates is apparently fatally wounded by Silver’s gunfire, to then be gently reminded:

” But Dead Tom’s always been dead – that’s why he’s called Dead Tom!”

Muppet Treasure Island is full of these brief, humorous sketches to keep the story light-hearted, making this Muppet film most akin to ‘The Muppet Show’, which was on the same level as ‘Monty Python’s Flying Circus’ in terms of breakneck surrealist comedy. These brief diversions from the action of the main storyline, such as the ongoing sub-plot of Brooklyn city rats using the voyage of the Hispaniola as a cruise, help to maintain the youngest of audience members’ attention. Whenever there is exposition, a joke is not too far away.

It would be a lie to say that, with this constant onslaught of gags, Muppet Treasure Island doesn’t come across as annoying just as many other children’s films do, with some reliance on long-drawn, unnecessary squealing and noise from the more silly Muppet characters. However, it has the edge over most contemporary family films as so much of its comedy doesn’t spawn from lazy pop culture references. Furthermore, despite it rivalling the laughter rates of comedy juggernauts like Airplane! (1980), the humour of Muppet Treasure Island doesn’t actually detract from the story itself. The straight men of the Muppets entourage such as Kermit and Sam Eagle are brought out for moments of peril, but most of the emotional poignancy is achieved by the human characters, namely Jim Hawkins and Long John Silver.

The balance and interaction between the Muppets and their human co-stars is one of the most important factors for a successful Muppet flick: in its predecessor, The Muppet Christmas Carol, Michael Caine (as Ebenezer Scrooge) was the focal point of the film’s plot, which hadn’t been done before by the Muppets. It’s a major reason that The Muppet Christmas Carol is one of the most popular Christmas movies of all time, achieving an impressive depth and seriousness that does Dickens’ philanthropic message justice. In Muppet Treasure Island, the plot centres around Jim Hawkins, played by child actor Kevin Bishop. Bishop’s lack of experience, having only previously appeared in children’s TV series ‘Grange Hill’, meant he struggled to carry the plot single-handedly, ultimately leaving much of the film’s emotional weight to screen and stage legend Tim Curry in his role as Long John Silver.

It is curious to note that whilst Michael Caine played the part of Ebenezer Scrooge as straight as he would in a Royal Shakespeare Company production, Tim Curry totally hams it up – the man is practically one of the Muppets. Still, even with this larger than life screen presence, he manages to navigate quieter moments with his human co-star, creating a very believable relationship between Hawkins and Silver, making Silver’s treachery all the more shocking and hurtful. Muppet productions, despite their reputation for wackiness, have always had substance, with each of their movies having a moral to their story, and as such Tim Curry’s Silver is a dangerous figure who helps to build the thrilling adventure story at the heart of this film, his flamboyance and camp touches making him the kind of villain who is impossible to not love, a key component of what makes Muppet Treasure Island so memorable and fun. Backed up by the experience gained from the four earlier Muppet movies, Juhl and Henson, along with Curry, knew how to nail the serious drama of “Treasure Island”, and it’s in getting this story right that the film production was able to give The Muppets a free pass to go absolutely nuts.

It truly is the craziness of Muppet Treasure Island that has made it so memorable for the 25 years since its release – there isn’t really a comparison to any other family film that can rival its unrestrained madcap comedy, capable of orchestrating a continuous stream of belly laughs from its audience. The fact that most of the human co-stars were unable to resist joining in with the hilarious Muppet antics is simply delightful.

The best demonstration of Muppet Treasure Island‘s ability to offer cheer is its musical legacy. One of the most underappreciated elements of all Muppet productions is their wealth of original songs, with these films being the most over-looked entries of musical cinema. Not only does the film boast a pre-Pirates of the Caribbean score from Hans Zimmer, but it has some of the most popular songs of the Muppets’ discography – it is very clear that all the stops are pulled out for this film’s musical numbers.

“Upstage Lads! This is my only Number!”

Much of the adoration garnered by Muppet Treasure Island is due to these musical numbers. All are relevant and integral to the plot, and they each help to create the joyful and adventurous mood of the film. They are essential to keeping true to the adventurous spirit of the original novel, being a vehicle for the best moments of Muppet comedy, and for illustrating the warmth and joy of this production. In The Muppet Movie, Kermit expresses his wish to be able to make millions of people happy, and this ambition more than comes true with Muppet Treasure Island, one of the smartest family comedies of the 90s and beyond.

For those who first saw the film released in 1996, we have never forgotten it, but the secret to its ongoing popularity even 25 years on is because it doesn’t disappoint. It never falls short of the expectations of those who return to the film as adults after first seeing it as children. Muppet Treasure Island is just as hilarious and as fun as we all remembered it back in the day, and while there are moments in which it can go over the top, and while it doesn’t necessarily offer anything new to long-standing fans, Muppet Treasure Island has set the bar for where we hope Muppet Productions in the future will eventually reach again.

17/24

Recommended for you: The Muppets Movies Ranked

Clearly Lydia is wise beyond her years.

Film as an art form has long been dictated by a ruling class of middle aged to old white men, so we here at The Film Magazine thought that we would turn the homogeneity of this critics circle on its head by instead asking a mixed race, dual-nationality little girl what the best movies of all time are. Needless to say, Lydia’s tastes are eclectic.

If you have ever wondered what cinema is to a girl born in the year 2011, make sure to strap in for this exclusive Movie List of the best films of all time according to someone whose favourite daily activities include learning dance moves from YouTube, listening to child pop sensation JoJo and playing Mario Kart 8 on the Nintendo Switch.

These are the 10 Best Films of All Time (According to a 9 Year Old Girl).

Make sure to follow us on Twitter to keep up to date with more lists like this one.

10. The Muppets: Most Wanted (2014)

Though admittedly a little confused as to which Kermit is which (a drawn-on mole and slight change in accent really isn’t clear enough when you’re getting overwhelmed with excitement every few minutes), The Muppets: Most Wanted is a personal favourite of Lydia’s. “I’ll give you what you want” is usually the quote of choice, and the wall scene in the Russian Gulag is the moment that brings about the biggest laughs.

To adults, this iteration of The Muppets is a little gimmicky and not as original as a lot of the group’s other work, but this nine year old finds it hilarious.

9. Moana (2016)

Like just about any child born from 1930 onwards, Walt Disney Animation has had a profound effect on Lydia’s experience of film. One of her first great loves was Moana, the beautifully animated 2016 animation starring Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson.

As you may expect, Lydia went all-in on her fandom, asking Santa Claus for the toys at Christmas and pleading with her Mum for the Moana dress from the Disney Store. She even told people that Maui was her brother, though only because they each shared “a big belly”.

To begin on a positive note, my favourite element of this adaption is the way in which it is framed – the Great Gonzo is playing Charles Dickens; he and Rizzo the Rat take us through the story, not only telling us what happens but making things happen (Gonzo tells us that Scrooge will come around the corner, and there he is). This is played with the Muppets’ signature all-knowing wink. Rizzo and Gonzo give great comic relief that is needed when watching this in a year such as ours. A particular favourite moment of mine is Rizzo climbing a fence to get to Scrooge’s house when he can fit through the bars. Gonzo and Rizzo provide us with information without it being condescending, giving context to the story: ‘Charles Dickens was a 19^th century novelist, a genius’. Gonzo also tells us all to go read the book at the end. How many other movies bother to do that?

Here’s what is hard to watch in 2019…

The things that Scrooge do to make him mean are not awful 19^th century deeds, but universally selfish and cruel things. We are told (through a helpful song) that ‘Old scrooge he loves his money because he thinks it gives him power’. This brings to mind a lot of people in our current society, not least prominent public figures and owners of multi-billion dollar corporations. One example of his evilness is that ‘He charges folks a fortune for his dark and drafty houses’. This shouldn’t be as relevant as it is today. I should be able to say “aren’t things so much better now? Thank God this is the past”. Alas, it is not, and there are people like Scrooge living today; people who benefit from the suffering of others.

Scrooge has no heart for charity, no kindness at all. His taxes pay for prisons and workhouses so the poor, in his eyes at least, should just go there. He has no sympathy for those who cannot pay their mortgages due to medical bills (thank god for the NHS – a staple of the UK that we at least have for now). Scrooge suggests that people are wasting their mortgage money on ‘frivolities’ which rings painfully true of some people’s attitudes today. Poor people are seen as criminal or ‘idle’. Scrooge does not even want his workers to be warm, which does lead to my favourite joke: the bookkeeping rats singing ‘This is my island in the sun’. Suffer in silence, be glad for what you have!

Now of course, the film is not all doom and gloom. Kermit (As Bob) attempts to bring some joy with ‘only one more sleep till Christmas’ after acting as union leader and getting his colleagues the day off. This scene is lovely, and I have to take a moment to appreciate the puppetry. Also, the joy of watching rats trying close blinds is enough to light up any dreary mid-winter evening.

We then get to the meat of the story.

Scrooge is visited by his old friends Marley and Marley who tell him that he will be visited by three ghosts of Christmas to help him see the errors of his mean ways.

The first ghost is the ghost of Christmas past, who is very creepy. We see Scrooge’s past and learn that he was a bit of a loner as kid, but as I am mad at him because of how he treats people in the present, I refuse to feel sorry for him just because he was a lonely little boy – why are so many evil men offered redemption through “tragic” backstories? Maybe don’t just sit and do extra homework – you might make some friends and learn some compassion and empathy. We are told that Scrooge is the ‘finest financial mind in the country’ by Sam the Eagle, then we learn that he isn’t making enough money to marry his sweetheart – so which is it? Scrooge asks the ghost ‘Why do you delight in torturing me?’ and all I can think is: because you are evil mate!

This is where we are exposed to “When Love is Gone”, which is a Michael Caine performed love song to the one that got away. This did not appear in the original theatrical release but was in the 1993 VHS version of my childhood. If you haven’t seen the version with this song in (ie, if you are not old like me) make sure to check it out.

Now, here is where the fun starts. The Ghost of Christmas present is a fun guy and I want him in my life. He shows Scrooge the family party that he refuses to go to every year. I also don’t feel sorry for him when his family are mean about him, and I really did when I was little because I love Micheal Caine, but; you know what Scrooge? You deserve people to think you are an ‘unwanted animal’.

We then visit the Cratchit household, which is a place of wonder. Bob (portrayed by Kermit) and his wife Emily (portrayed by Miss Piggy) bring the beloved Kermit and Piggy dynamic to the classic tale. The family drink to Scrooge as the founder of the feast (though Scrooge has just pointed out how said feast is very small). Miss Piggy is the voice of reason (me) here and is super sassy about how horrible Scrooge is and we should not settle for the little that he gives.

Tiny Tim is the character we should all hope to be, because he is grateful for have what he has, which is nothing. He sings a lovely song about being graceful, which of course makes Scrooge feel very bad. This feels very much like thanksgiving, or at least how I imagine thanksgiving to be because a British Christmas is much more drunk and angry.

Scrooge is then visited by the ghost of Christmas future. Scrooge is now starting to understand the error of his ways, that he has the power to change lives, particularly that of Tiny Tim. He realises: ‘A life can be made right’… I’m looking at you Boris – you too can change your future by being a better person. Scrooge wakes up, realises it’s Christmas and decides to buy the biggest Christmas turkey for the Cratchits. Scrooge promises to share the wealth, giving Bob a pay rise and giving money to charity. Everything is wonderful because Scrooge is living his life in pursuit of helping others, and everyone is happy!

Having seen the Christmas classic It’s A Wonderful Life in the interim of my most recent rewatches of The Muppet Christmas Carol, I did not get hit with the same emotional punch from this puppeted adaptation as I thought I would. Maybe it’s because I’m cynical and refuse to believe that Scrooge will change; but then maybe I only think that because people like him still exist over 100 years later? In all honesty, 2019 is probably the wrong year for any adaptation of “A Christmas Carol”, especially when not even the great Kermit the Frog can lighten the darkness enveloping our society.

Funnily enough, this has proven to be a difficult article to complete, with this now being the third request from our editor to attempt this piece. I’ve been trying to be objective, but in light of Jim Henson Pictures’ new found infamy with the sugar snorting, silly-string-jizzing antics of The Happytime Murders, I feel I have nothing to lose in tossing out my controversial Muppet opinions. The latest effort of Brian Henson’s Razzie-winning cynical satire, and the last failed ‘Muppets’ TV series consolidates the basic truth that Americans don’t deserve The Muppets. Seeing the cornerstone of my childhood kicked about and unappreciated boils my blood. So, whilst possessed by the spirit of an enraged Lord Grade, and with the equal ferocity of when I rip the wax-strip from my underarm, I dive into this piece with well documented evidence for my shocking prejudices.

Author’s note: all films listed are based on cinematic release only (sorry The Muppets’ Wizard of Oz).

8. The Muppets Most Wanted (2014)

This is the exact kind of movie that makes you despise Disney’s monopolisation of Hollywood and international media.

After the massive success of The Muppets (2011), it was of course time to cash in on the hype with a sequel. The problem with this was not necessarily Disney’s involvement in the continuation of the franchise, but more how The Muppets Most Wanted is the laziest and sloppiest attempt at film-making I’ve ever seen: they make the plot up as they go along. The World’s Most Dangerous Frog, Constantine, swaps places with our beloved Kermit as The Muppets set off on their comeback world tour, orchestrated by an evil Ricky Gervais who is in cahoots with Constantine in a plot to steal the English crown jewels and frame the Muppets for the crime. It’s a silly enough idea, but the execution stinks, resulting in an instantly forgettable movie.

With nowhere near enough focus on The Muppets themselves, the audience’s attention is directed towards new characters, a risky move for a newly re-established franchise, especially as it was the dynamic between the central Muppet characters that made them such a success in the first place. Even worse, whilst The Muppets upheld traditional puppetry and special effects, Disney couldn’t resist the temptation of CGI in the sequel. Honestly, I’m seething… it looked as convincing as Gerry Anderson’s wooden puppets.

There is an attempt to cover up the lack of strong plot and puppetry betrayal with hark backs to The Muppet Show, but the distinct lack of variety and vaudeville routines does not justify these empty nostalgia trips and the vapid “celebrity” cameos. Once was more than enough for me. I won’t be revisiting The Muppets Most Wanted any time soon, and no wonder the franchise came to a resounding stop at this point. You could even put the blame for The Happytime Murders firmly on the shoulders of this entry.

Recommended for you: Top 5 Moments from ‘The Dark Crystal’ (1982)

7. Muppets from Space (1999)

One reason I’ve avoided writing this particular piece for so long is because I knew it would hurt. I’m so sorry Muppets From Space, I love you but I can’t justify putting you at a higher spot than second from worst.

After two book adaptions in the musical tradition, Jim Henson Pictures took a rather odd turn in deciding to focus on Gonzo’s origins story – and apparently, he’s from outer space! I remember being over the moon when this movie came out, and to this day it is the only Muppets feature that I have seen in the cinema. It does hold a special place in my heart beyond this shallow nostalgia: Gonzo has always been my favourite out The Muppets as I related to his natural weirdness – my mam always affectionately referred to me as her little weirdo.

At times people weren’t always very kind to me or my idiosyncrasies which can really make you feel like you don’t fit in, but I always eventually realised that the people who mattered still loved me, and this is Gonzo’s story in this movie: feeling terribly out of place in the world, pinning his hopes on a long-lost family from space, and after nearly getting his brain sucked out he finally realises The Muppets were his family all along.

However, my perspective has been massively distorted by rose-tinted glasses (and the devastating panache of Pepe the King Prawn) and compared to other productions it does, I must reluctantly admit, fall flat.

Clearly, there was a massive drop in production value after Muppet Treasure Island (cramped sets, lacklustre production designs, mediocre star appearances and underwhelming location shoots). Despite a popping soundtrack, it was still rather disappointing to be deprived of original Muppet music which was always an integral part of the franchise. Oddly enough, unlike the other lower ranking movies in this list, the imbalance between humour and drama is caused by too much wackiness and not a powerful enough plot (or a dramatic plot not delivered effectively). Muppets From Space benefits from nostalgia but it won’t impress newcomers, landing it at number 7 on this list.

When Netflix released their teaser trailer for a prequel series to the 1982 film, The Dark Crystal, with an all-important flash of an animatronic Skeksi, I screamed. This film has been embedded into my psyche for as long as I can remember; all the way back to when I used to scream “Kamalaiah!” as I ran under a South Shields overpass when I was three. Needless to say, I’m one of the many people who is incredibly excited for this project.

It does leave the question however… what’s with the our current nostalgia for the 1980s, especially in TV and Hollywood?

Well it’s probably down to the current generation of film and TV show makers either growing up or enjoying their youth in that decade, but I feel like there may be more to it; I mean… my God the mainstream cinema of this decade has been rammed with remakes and reboots, with the likes of the Disney Corporation announcing live-action remakes of all their animated classics as well as a new Star Wars trilogy. Many of these reboots have been an enjoyable and even an incredible watch, but the lack of original output is now grating on audiences and critics alike, and that’s not even acknowledging the movies that have been straight-up insulting (yeah, you may have all have laughed at me and my plain refusal to watch Beauty and the Beast, but you’re all crying now that Mulan is being messed around with). Unfortunately, I believe that laziness and the want of a cheap buck is playing a major role in such executive decisions, with the art of the whole thing taking a backseat. But, with some of the more outstanding movies, the quality of the art communicates a real love – a misty-eyed trip down memory lane to what seem like simpler times.

Whenever I’ve been taking about all the cool films I’ve seen in the cinema, my Mam has often commented on how crap cinema was in the 70s. Now… before all you film nerds rise up in horror at such a statement, I am fully aware of how much of an important time the seventies was for film – independent and horror movies especially – but consider this: my Mam was a kid and then a teenager in the 1970s, so apart from Disney movies there wouldn’t have been many films that would attract that demographic in that decade, apart from Grease or whatever. Even so, my Mam’s claim to fame is that she saw the first Star Wars in the cinema while on a date, and funnily enough, I feel like that movie is one of the first of the Lucas/Scott/Gilliam/Spielberg movement of the 1980s which has been burnt into the minds of children of many a generation for years to come. It was these movies that ensured that as the 70s came to a close, everyone cheered up a bit and films stopped being so sepia, instead welcoming a cavalcade of colourful movies reminiscent of the 1950s, making this a new and exciting time.

There are so many movies that encapsulate the iconic fantasy and sci-fi feel of the eighties, but the most original and fantastical is The Dark Crystal, directed by Jim Henson and Frank Oz, the same guys responsible for The Muppets.

The Dark Crystal’s inception, in a way, was a bit of an accident, with the conceptual designer Brian Froud working on an unfinished script and having a misunderstanding of the film’s title, which was supposed to be ‘The Dark Chrysalis’. As a result, Froud presented a rather bamboozled Jim Henson with the concept art of a crystal, and without this simple miscommunication we may not have such a unique and epic fantasy adventure.

The setting is completely alien: “another world, another time, in the Age of Wonder.” A planet enjoys bounty and beauty until the mystical Crystal which somehow governs the land is damaged, and a single piece is lost. Upon the cracking of the Crystal two new races come to being: the Skeksis and the Mystics. The Skeksis are power-hungry and cruel, and it is they who take over the castle, using the now Dark Crystal to ravage the land for their own needs, terrorising and enslaving all other races. After their millennia rule, the world is now a wasteland devoid of beauty. The Mystics, which were driven from the castle, instead live a simple, gentle life of peace, practising natural sorcery, a source of wisdom and kindness to all. However, after a thousand years both races are nearly extinct with only a handful surviving, and now a prophecy is soon to be fulfilled. The leader of the Mystics tells the Gelfling boy, Jen, whom he has rescued and raised, that it his destiny to find the Dark Crystal’s missing shard. It is Jen’s task to use it to heal the Crystal before the three Suns in the sky meet to form “The Great Conjunction”. If he fails, the Skeksis will become immortal and will rule forever.

As you can see from that plot summary, The Dark Crystal does draw on common tropes, being that it is very much a typical Quest story, but it succeeds in taking these common ideas and making them completely its own. Now, I do have a penchant for fantasy: I am one of the new generation that completely fell in love with the Lord of the Rings series, but one of my pet peeves of fantasy is that they all seem to imitate Tolkien’s formula of men, elves and dwarves; it’s boring and overdone. In The Dark Crystal however, all the races and creatures are completely unique to their own world. Yes, they are inspired by our own mythology and nature, but the genius of Brian Froud manages to take familiar images and features and mix them up enough to create something entirely new. Some of them are awe-inspiring, some of them are terrifying. The Skeksis look like vultures with desiccated flesh and porcupine spines – I defy any adult to not be scared by the Skeksi Emperor’s death as his face and body crumbles into dust. And it’s not just the main characters who are their own original designs. Each random creature, like Fizzgig and his two rows of teeth or the Land Striders with their freakishly huge shoulder blades – even plants like the bushes that shy away from Jen as he walks past – each have their own special idiosyncratic design born from Froud’s mind.

This movie boasts the amazing creativity of the conceptual design from the characters to the sets, which can be argued for most modern movies (though you can’t rule out that the impact of Froud’s design work in many movies since), but the greatest difference between The Dark Crystal and modern fantasies is the execution.

I don’t want to insult the huge amount of skill, patience and stress that goes into CG effects, but my God puppeteers and performers in the extraordinarily heavy Garthim costumes (the Skeksis’ soldiers) having to be hung up on to racks every 5 minutes just so they could rest… that’s just something else; that is dedication to the art. In fact, one of The Dark Crystal’s claims to fame is that it is the first motion picture to exclusively feature puppets (with only the odd human performer for some wide shots). All those fantastical creatures and terrifying beasts, every amazing courageous feat our heroes performed, every bloody scene in that movie was a careful orchestration and choreography of performers who were slugging their guts out in heavy costumes or operating complex puppets, and they didn’t shy away from the action despite all the obstacles they would have had to overcome. As such there were some very energetic scenes featured in the movie – all of the Garthim battle scenes in particular – which is remarkable considering how numerous these scenes are and how difficult they must have been to shoot.

So yeah… puppets. People would probably expect something terribly hokey and laughable, but I’ll say to all you haters right now, this isn’t a Thunderbirds affair of jaunty, flailing limbs and dead eyes rolling around in their sockets [sorry Gerry, I actually really love your shows], this is a visually stunning film that will suspend your belief and take you on a mad, emotional ride. Yes, you can tell the characters are puppets and in some instances you can easily discern how some of the creatures are operated – for example, the land striders are clearly actors walking on all fours on stilts – but that doesn’t take anything away from the movie. As a kid, you’re so taken by how freaky these creatures look that you’re too busy being in awe to notice they’re just guys in suits; and when you’re an adult, you’re too impressed by those actors being able to run using stilts, on all fours no less, to care that they are puppets.

Also this is the Jim Henson Production Company we’re talking about – the people who bring such character and life to their creations. The whole world consider the characters to be actual people and celebrities in their own right (and I defy anyone who claims they were not upset over the break-up of Kermit and Miss Piggy). The Dark Crystal is no exception to the Henson magic, with each character having their own mannerisms: Jen who has never left the Mystic’s home is clumsy and is a touch unsure on his feet, whilst Kira, another Gelfing Jen meets on his journey, is graceful and far more confident in her movement. The effect of this, and the whole world being solely inhabited by puppets, is that it looks believable. This was cutting edge, and would continue to be so for the coming 30 years, with the Jim Henson Workshop being the authority on puppets in TV and film. The realness and tangibility of all the creatures in The Dark Crystal means they have hardly aged and can hold up against some of the major blockbusters of today in terms of realism.

The major blockbusters that quickly come to mind are the recent DCEU releases – another dirty film confession of mine is that I actually enjoyed Batman v Superman, but I cannot deny that the last half hour wandered far into the domain of sheer stupidity; that Kryptonian glob monster looked absolutely atrocious. The CG was just plain crap! It looked like the cave troll from The Fellowship of the Ring, which came out 15 years previously! Then in Wonder Woman this year, some of Diana’s more death-defying leaps looked suspiciously like PS2 game-play. And you know what, these underwhelming special effects didn’t make me smile like the goofiness of the special effects in many classic 80s fantasy flicks. I was unimpressed, because both of these films were major blockbusters yet they still couldn’t manage to deliver decent CG effects, and that screamed of laziness and cost-cutting which is something The Dark Crystal can never be accused of.

This is essentially why I am so excited by this current 80s obsession, as I feel it is part of a desire to go back to better cinematic times. Yeah nostalgia can be blinding and misleading at times; using CG effects allows the creation of spine-tingling visuals and high-charged action sequences without the danger and difficulties of physical effects. However, as CG has become normalised, all those movie bosses will question the use of alternatives because relying on computers is cheaper and easier, essentially killing a craft. Personally, I love these older techniques and the filmmakers willing to exert themselves for their craft because they visibly, and undeniably, love the craft and the act of producing art for consumption, and I favour movies in which love has been squeezed into every frame because it nurtures creativity, giving the films a greater lasting impact.

Take the likes of Sam Raimi and his series of horrors in the 80s – it involved dragging cameras across forest floors, chasing its stars with a motorbike, and Raimi recording the sound of wind to create terrifying demonic voices. Raimi was so focused on his creation, he took inspiration from his surroundings which is simply wonderful. Furthermore, with JJ Abrams and his favouring of practical effects taking the wheel for Star Wars: The Force Awakens, the franchise was now miles away from the dark days of the prequels and all its amorphous CG creations – he made the effort to strike a more perfect balance between computer wizardry and physical effects, resulting in a cleaner and more realistic look. In fact, I felt a tiny bit convinced that what I was witnessing was indeed a story from a long time ago, in a galaxy far, far away. Then of course there’s Jim Henson, possibly the greatest children’s entertainer in the world, who respected his audience and trusted in what they wanted to see: ‘Sesame Street’ is the face of educational TV, the Muppets are the epitome of silliness that both children and adults can enjoy, and his fantasy creations were terrifying enough to not alienate children but instead capture a place in their hearts forever. He never reduced his productions to minimal effort – The Dark Crystal took itself very seriously – and he always managed to avoid the feeling of a hackneyed production on his way to making special, fantastical pictures.

So, if film-makers of today are imitating some of the great movies from that decade, then good. All artists copied the works of past masters before becoming geniuses in their own rights, and with the likes of the new Dark Crystal series embracing animatronics and puppets in all their glory, we could be witnessing the beginning of a re-emergence in the so-called ‘old’ techniques that rose the original to prominence, and that can only be a good thing for all of us who appreciate the craft of cinema and its many forms of art.

Number 10: The Princess Diaries (2001)

This 2001 film is based on the teen book series of the same name written by Meg Cabot; and who better to bring a modern day Princess story to life than Disney? The Princess Diaries was the debut performance of Anne Hathaway and, together with veteran Julie Andrews, this made for a very strong cast. Now, there is nothing particularly complex of even original from this film, but what it is, is simply enjoyable and fun – it keeps the innocence of any Disney Princess film from the past but brings it into the 21st century. Primarily it is a film for young girls, the typical story of the awkward ugly duckling becoming a swan, but it is also a film about growing up and knowing who you are, and it can therefore be enjoyed by everyone.

Number 9: 101 Dalmatians (1996)

The 1996 version of 101 Dalmatians is a live action remake of the 1961 animated classic. It is a story that everyone knows and loves and with a screenplay by John Hughes, and an incredible cast, not to mention some very adorable dogs. It more than lives up to the original. 101 Dalmatians was one of the first live action remakes from Disney, an idea that has spiraled recently. What really stands out in this film is the incredible performance by Glenn Close as the ultimate Disney villain Cruella De Vil – she plays the part to perfection. The dogs are the main feature of this film however, and the integration between live action and computer animation to give them human like personalities, is almost seamless – a great triumph as this was still new territory in the effects world. The film is clean and fun, and clearly for children, but those who know the story or anyone who grew up with the original will love it too.

Number 8: Saving Mr Banks (2013)

Saving Mr Banks is the emotional story behind the creation of one of Disney’s greatest masterpieces, Mary Poppins. The film centers around the struggle to get the approval from Mrs Travers, the author of Mary Poppins, to bring her book to life. She is reluctant to give up her beloved Mary Poppins because of her personal connection to the story, something we discover throughout the film. The performance from Emma Thomson is incredible and the likeness Tom Hanks has to Walt Disney is uncanny. Let’s face it Walt was going to be a challenge for anyone to play, but Hanks gave it everything he had and completely pulled it off.. However, it’s a surprising performance from Colin Farrell as Travers’ father that steals the show; he is a man who loves his family but can not overcome his personal demons. Saving Mr Banks is beautiful, hilarious and heartbreaking all at once; an amazing film.

Number 7: Hocus Pocus (1993)

Hocus Pocus is a film I remember being terrified of as a child but has become something I will go back and watch every Halloween without fail. It is a traditional Halloween scary story that has witches, zombies and black cats; everything you could possibly want. It is a magical fairy tale that is comical, charming, funny and creepy, without losing its appeal to children. The three witches are cast perfectly and the two musical numbers, ‘I’ll Put A Spell On You‘ from Bette Midler and ‘Come Little Children‘ from Sarah Jessica Parker are brilliant and haunting. It seems to be one those Disney films that is timeless and will be watched for many years to come.

Number 6: Tron:Legacy (2010)

When I first watched Tron:Legacy I was truly blown away. As well as paying homage to the original, it offers something new and fresh from Disney. This film is a spectacle for the eyes, a visual experience that deserves to be marveled at, not to mention that the soundtrack created by Daft Punk is phenomenal. The action sequences throughout the film are outstanding, in particular the bar scene, and the overall look is simply stunning. The story is kept simple so that it still appeals to young kids but it is still strong enough to keep the attention of an older audience. Tron: Legacy was Disney taking a risk by rebooting a cult favourite from the 80’s, but it was a risk that completely paid off; they managed to create something spectacular. Bring on Tron 3.

Number 5: The Muppets (2011)

The Muppets is the ultimate feel-good film, and is as much for adults as it is for kids. The jokes are genuinely hilarious, the songs are amazing, and the plot is as fun as it could possibly be. To put it plainly, it is a truly happy film experience. I don’t say this about films very often but The Muppets is pretty much flawless – I can not think of one thing that I dislike about the film. It is filled with nostalgia and has all of the original characters we know and love such as Kermit and Miss Piggy back, as well as being brilliant enough to bring in a whole new generation of fans. The writing from Jason Segal is full of affection and passion for these beloved characters – it is smart, witty and completely heartfelt. Every time I watch this I am unable to stop smiling.

Number 4: Enchanted (2007)

Enchanted is a new and interesting take on the traditional Disney Princess film, merging the world of animation and live action like never before. It as a traditional fairy tale in the modern world. When Giselle is thrust into the world of modern day New York city, it is clear that she will have to make some big adjustments. She is filled with the innocent notions of love at first sight and good always being triumphant over evil, but when she meets Robert she discovers that these notions do not seem to exist in this world. It is not only Giselle that has to adjust to this, but Prince Edward t00, for when he comes looking for her he is confronted with new and strange sights, and it is simply hilarious when this happens. Enchanted is charming, sweet and magical, it will go down as a true Disney classic; a film I will never get tired of watching.

Number 3: Maleficent (2014)

This is a whole different side to the story we thought we knew. Angelina Jolie’s casting as Maleficent was a moment of inspiration, and the supporting cast only strengthen her performance. After seeing this you will never look at Sleeping Beauty in the same way again; it is no longer a black and white good vs evil story, Maleficent gives dimension to a character that was never really explained in the original animated classic. The film was a lot darker than I expected, and the origin of Maleficent’s evil doings is one I did not expect to be explored in a Disney film. It is a story of emotional and physical betrayal, and how someone overcomes that. It is not a simple revenge story, it is far more complicated, it is about rebuilding yourself emotionally and not slipping into darkness. It is about learning to love and trust again, and not in the typical romantic sense. The story is sophisticated and the visuals are stunning, it is not a simple retelling and is potentially a sign of great things to come from Disney.

Number 2: Pirates of the Caribbean: The Curse of the Black Pearl (2003) 

Much like 2015’s Tomorrowland is based on a section of the Disneyland Park, Pirates of the Caribbean is based on a famous Disneyland ride. I have seen this film more times in the cinema than any other. It is a film that is thoroughly enjoyable – it is full of sword fighting, shouting, and utter mayhem – just what you would expect from a Pirate film with a killer score. Pirates of the Caribbean creates one of Disney’s most memorable and lovable characters, Captain Jack Sparrow, played by Johnny Depp who gives one of the performance of his life. The Sparrow character makes this film what it is; he is hilarious and fun and breathes new life into the notion of being a ‘Pirate’. The rest of the cast stand up well too; the characters are interesting and they all gel together effectively. The magic of Disney brought the beloved ride to life, and now Pirates of the Caribbean: The Curse of the Black Pearl will go down as one of the greatest live-action films in Disney history.

Number 1: Mary Poppins (1964)

Mary Poppins is a true Disney classic. It is the perfect combination of live action and animation and in its time was something completely new and innovative from Disney. Julie Andrews is the perfect Mary Poppins and truly deserving of her Academy Award. Even though the special effects may now be seen as outdated, the film stands the test of time and is still loved more than 50 years later. It is silly, spectacular and heartwarming, with musical numbers that are simply exquisite, not to mention some of the most memorable in movie musical history. Mary Poppins is magical, charming and has a good message for children and adults, (as explained in Saving Mr Banks) Mary is not there for the children she is there for the father, to bring the family back together and to make him realise that his family is more important than his job or money. It is a beautiful story and a beautiful film that will continue to delight for generations to come.

5. Poke’mon 4Ever (2001)

SPOILER ALERT!!!

I’ve always been a fan of Poke’mon, admittedly, but I never thought that one of the movies would hit me in quite the way that Poke’mon 4Ever did in the spring of 2014 when I finally got around to watching it. You see, as an avid fan of the games and an almost religious watcher of the TV series growing up, Poke’mon 4Ever changed everything. Everything! Not only did a Poke’mon die – I mean, come on, that’s hard enough to handle Nintendo – but it was revealed that a secondary character who had helped Ash throughout the movie was, in fact, a time travelling Professor Oak. No f’n way! This meant that when Oak was a kid, he met a kid in the future called Ash who had a Pikachu and the rest of it. He then grew to be the professor he was and knew that one day the Pikachu he had would become Ash’s Pikachu. Mind. Blown. It was as if everything I knew about Poke’mon was enhanced by this one very simple plot twist, making my enjoyment of the film far superior to what I could’ve ever expected, and earning it a spot on this list.

4. Clueless (1995)

I’d spent 24 years of my life hearing about how wonderful and awesome Clueless (1995) was, that I simply rejected the idea of ever watching it. I mean, what does a man in his twenties have in common with a film about teenage girls from the mid-90s anyhow? I was 4 when this movie came out! Even so, I reluctantly picked Amy Heckerling’s movie as my Netflix choice for the evening in an attempt to finally understand the references and confirm in my own mind just how below average it was. 97 minutes later and I’m almost entirely infatuated with it. Why? I couldn’t really tell you. Perhaps it was Alicia Silverstone’s flawless performance and ultimate cuteness, or Paul Rudd, or even Brittany Murphy as I’d never seen her before? Maybe it was the perfect mix of dumb blonde and super intelligent teenager that the Cher character portrayed? All I know is that I sat down wanting to pick this movie apart and I simply couldn’t because it was way too good. If you’re in the same boat as I was… watch it! You won’t regret it.

3. What If (2014)

Ever put on a movie with the intention of using it as background noise and a bit of light entertainment while eating, working, etc.? Because I do, and What If was supposed to be one of those movies, but things didn’t turn out that way. Instead, the movie starring Daniel Radcliffe and Zoe Kazan (of whom I’m a huge fan), took me by surprise as a well put together, charming, and funny rom-comedrama that I couldn’t help but to become glued to as the story unfolded. Sure, it was very much like the other movies in its genre and there wasn’t that much I could point to in order to illustrate why it was more enjoyable than its vast sea of compadre’s, but What If holds a special place in my movie-loving heart anyway. What If, a surprisingly good movie for its genre.

2. The Muppets (2011)

My mother was never a fan of The Muppets and we (my brother and I), as children, never really watched The Muppets on television or video… later DVD. In fact, the most exposure we had to the brand was through an Australian release that we got as a present from our Great Uncle who lived there – it was hardly the best way to get into things I must admit. But, when The Muppets was re-released under the Disney banner, I got dragged to the cinema by a couple of friends with the premonition that I’d hate it. Man was I wrong! The Muppets (2011), written by Jason Segel and directed by James Bobin, was everything I look for in a comedy – it was self-conscious, it broke the fourth wall at the right times, and it was funny! Seeing this movie in the cinema was one of my favourite cinema going experiences ever because of my shock with regard to the quality of the movie and the resulting fandom that followed it. With a heart like nothing else you’ll ever see, and some of the funniest and cutest moments in any movie (in my opinion), The Muppets is my number 2 most surprisingly good movie.

1. Pitch Perfect (2012)

The 2012 glee-club based comedy Pitch Perfect, directed by Jason Moore, was about as far from my tastes as I could possibly imagine. A pseudo-musical of a glee club… Nah. I’ve never been one for musicals – as last week’s post illustrated in my expression of disinterest regarding Burlesque (2010) – and I was certainly never a Glee (the TV show) fan. Before seeing Pitch Perfect in the winter of 2014, I wasn’t even that much of a fan of Anna Kendrick… unbelievable I know! But, this glee club comedy that verged on a parody of the TV show, was fantastic. It was funny, it was well performed by its stellar cast (most notably Rebel Wilson), and most importantly given its sub-genre it was ‘feel-good’. In fact, I’d challenge anyone to find a film that clearly out performs Pitch Perfect in the ‘feel-good’ category because I’m almost certain that there isn’t one. I am so glad that I watched this movie!